story to follow...

Let's just say that we have a story to tell you. Today is going to be a very interesting, very fun day. So, the only clue you have as to what is going on is this giant logo.

what we're reading (the economic naturalist)

Hello. We just finished a book called “The Economic Naturalist”. A Cornell professor found that very few of his students (and very few economic professionals) properly understood basic economic principles. For instance, only 21% of economic professionals correctly answered a multiple choice question related to Opportunity Cost. That is worse than if the answers were simply chosen randomly (4 answers would mean that the correct answer would be given 25% of the time in the case of blind guesses). What he found is that these principles are often so muddled in academic language as to completely useless to the common man and somewhat complicated even to professionals.



This book fixes that. Ever wondered why soda comes in round cans and milk in square cartons? Ever wonder why tickets to Broadway shows are cheaper at the last minute but airplane tickets are more expensive? Are you curious as to why rural people marry earlier than urban people or why no one wants a date who is "too into them"? It’s these sort of simple questions that the professor uses to unlock the beauty of economics and seal them into your brain. Trust me – I don’t see a milk carton without thinking about the reason why it is the shape it is.

Recommended.

beauty in the brokenness

Can I paint a picture for you?

Just the other day I caught a glimpse of a sight that is simply perfect to describe life here.

Stefani had just finished a voice lesson with a quadriplegic girl named Jadie. She proceeded to roll Jadie and her wheelchair (which features two flat tires, by the way) down the pothole-laden ramp to the front of the church.

Waiting there was young Aria, who you met in a previous post.
”meet aria”
If you’ll remember, Aria is a child from the squatter camp. She is fatherless and waiting on time and disease to render her motherless as well. She is endlessly lovable and endlessly naughty. She is funny and dirty and altogether wonderful. As such, she latches on to one side of the wheelchair and helps (read: hinders) pushing it away from the church.

Then comes Peter, the church drunk. He fits every stereotype that you might assign to the church drunk and we love every bit of him. He is middle-aged, with a mighty mustache. He tries so hard to quit and then tells the whole world how worthless he is when he fails. He is a perfect picture of grace, even if he walks slightly askew and smells of cheap liquor. In our picture, he asks Stef for a bit of money and she smartly counters that he should take a walk with her.

Jadie just lives down the street.

So, down the street they go. And here is the perfect picture…

Aria, 4 years-old and shoeless next to Peter, stumbling, mumbling and generally enjoying the sunshine… Next in line is Stef and Jadie, a 26 year-old American pushing a 15 year-old South African in a 30 year-old wheelchair that’s riding only on the rims.

We are surrounded by brokenness. Young and old, black and white… It is the hallmark of Mayfair Baptist Church. Really, it is the hallmark of all of us, broken and incomplete, needing a little help and a few friends to make the journey – even if it’s just down the street. Of the many things we learn from the vulnerable here: there is beauty in the brokenness of life.

all the roots grow deeper when it's dry

It occurs to me that maybe the reason that God drags us through the desert is not so He can break us down or grind away all the mess that’s built up over the years – maybe He just wants to encounter us in a place where we have nothing to distract us from His presence. Maybe the desert forces us to dig deep, find our source, find Him in a new way.

I’ve long thought of the desert of a place of growth, thanks to David Wilcox (tasty photo below). He wrote a song called “All the Roots Grow Deeper When It’s Dry”. Full lyrics to song



It is a beautiful picture, really. Even when the dryness comes, there is growth going on under the surface. The roots (in the depths of our soul) begin to dig deeper into the soil, searching for a source of replenishing moisture, seeking the coolness found far below the punishing conditions on the surface.

So, why are we surprised when our greatest times of growth are the times when the greatest adversity comes against us? Down in the depths of our selves, there is nothing but Him. No distractions, no preoccupations. Just Him.

All the roots grow deeper when it’s dry.

explaining darkness into light

The question has only been asked of us a couple of times: “What is this ‘darkness into light’ stuff?”

One astute reader found a connection between Hasidic-Reggae artist Matisyahu and the blog title. Others, we can only assume, created their own realities (or more likely never gave it much thought).



The truth is that the blog title was dually influenced by the bible and a certain Matisyahu song.

The bible-writer John, in particular, talks a lot about darkness and light. Never is it more profound than when Jesus drops “I am the light of the world” on everyone in John 8:12. He goes on to say that, “whoever follows me will never walk in darkness, but will have the light of life.”

So, I think, in a very simple way, that is the essence of the blog title. Jesus is light of the world. And we can feed hungry kids, but it won’t satisfy them. We can bring water to the parched lips of the desperate here, but that will never quench their thirst. The only thing that will last is Jesus, the light. And so, we seek darkness (injustice, oppression, poverty – spiritual, physical, or otherwise) and we seek to bring the light to it.

A second, much more subtle idea that sits behind the blog title does indeed come from Matisyahu and his song “Warrior”. As a Hasidic Jew (read: orthodox – Google it), Matisyahu raps about some very deep, profound subjects. He also shares our history through the Torah.

During a performance of this song, he took a minute to explain where the idea came from:

“Hasidis explains that everything in this world, everything in this life has an inner essence and an inner soul. And when it started out, before the soul was reincarnated into this life, into this body and time and place that we find ourselves…it was basking above in the rays of Godliness. And it comes into this world for one reason, you know: that it should transform the darkness into light. It should take the darkness of this world and make it light…”

Now, the word “reincarnated” scares a lot of people. But this isn’t the idea that I will die and come back as a gerbil or a carburetor or something in my next life. This is the idea that our soul was known to God before our physical bodies existed on this earth. This is the idea that somehow, we existed with Him in paradise and that He has hidden that beauty and that “light” deep within us. It is this idea that leads many Christians today to believe that when we encounter “Truth” (i.e. God’s glory in Jesus), we know it to be true not because of some evidence or emotional experience, but because we “remember” it.

So, Matisyahu quotes an idea that says that we are known to God and He sends us into the world in order to bring the darkness into the light, in order to bring glory back to His name.

There are Bible passages that correspond. Check Ecclesiastes 3:11… “He has made everything beautiful in its time. He has also set eternity in the hearts of men; yet they cannot fathom what God has done from beginning to end.”

“He has set eternity in the hearts of men…” That is a really rich idea: That, somehow, we know what eternity is like. That maybe the reason that no amount of money or sex or power or status can please us is because we know of something (somewhere in the depths of our soul) that surpasses all of those things. Somewhere, God has set eternity and its beauty within us. Mysteriously beautiful…

2 Corinthians 4:6 says this: “For God, who said, "Let light shine out of darkness,"made his light shine in our hearts to give us the light of the knowledge of the glory of God in the face of Christ.”

God made His light to shine in our hearts. Is that incredible to you? It freaks me out. God did this to give us the knowledge of the glory of God in the face of Christ? I cannot even fathom the glory of God, much less that somewhere within me I possess the knowledge of it. Like I said, mysteriously beautiful…

Embracing all of that, darkness into light.

Here are the exact lyrics to the Matisyahu song I spoke of:

"Warrior"

You're a warrior fighting for your soul
Taken from the world above and brought down the world below

You're the son of his majesty
Remember how it used to be
In the light of day it's easy to see
Now it's nighttime
You had to leave

Separated from the king
Now the water's rushing and you keep trying to swim against the stream
And it seems, like your not moving the many water's gushing you gasp for air
Almost drowning ears ringing, once upon a time we were singing
One day the trees will stand and clap hands
Stream of thought getting caught in the klipa, this place is just a shell, external
Egos swell, that one'll burn ya, we fell a long way down, that eternal frown'll get you
You look vexed it's the dregs, the yetzer hara's lurking
Trying to make you forget we got a job to do
You're a priest and a prince and you can't be moved

[Chorus:]
You're a warrior, Fighting for your soul
Taken from a world above, and brought down to a world below
Re-united, re-united return the princess to the king,
Re-united, re-united, she's been taken for so long
Re-united, re-united and then she'll be filled with joy
Re-united, re-united like the days of her youth

Descended to the pit
What's this feeling can't get rid of it
Soul sick
Can't seem to shake it
When one retires at night weeping, joy will come in the morning
You made my mountain stand strong

[Chorus]

Like and ancient memory
Remember how it used to be
Close your eyes and breath in
That's the scent of freedom
Ringing across the sea
Land of milk and honey
One day will wake up from this dream and we'll stop sleeping,
Oh, yo, then we'll see clearly

[Chorus]

have you got a minute? (of father time and aggressive curbs)

(Channeling the ghost of Kevin O'Keefe...)

Have you got a minute?

We’re running into more and more people here that seem to lack the ability to take conversational shortcuts. You know these people? Well, Sister Sledge moved out some time ago and last week her room was occupied for one night by Father Time, a guy who showed up to the Leadership Summit without accommodation for the night.

So, we took him in. No big deal. Except that the dude could talk for hours. And about nothing. Without even listening to the response. He spent thirty minutes constructing a very complex, very example-laden question about church constitutions even though I spent the first 5 minutes of the conversation drilling into his brain that I knew nothing about such things.

Another chick who will go unnamed will show up at our door and just start gushing – and she’ll ask the same question (and get the same answer) 10 times and in 10 different ways.

We endure it. But it feels good to release the frustration sometimes. So, do with all of that what you will. Thanks.

Thinking of the above…maybe it’s just the efficiency-junkie in me coming out. I am realizing that the older I get, the more I value efficiency (maybe I am growing more impatient and I am trying to spin it with some Protestant-work-ethic lies, who knows). As an example, I spent a good part of a day trying to calculate what the average passenger on the church bus cost to bring in in order to see if there was a more cost-effective way to transport the locals to church. Is this bordering on madness?

Stef is the new transport manager of Mayfair Baptist Church. Ya, she drives the church van all over the city, running errands and picking up the faithful. She gets long looks at almost every stoplight from pedestrians who are shocked to see a woman (and a white woman at that) driving a van. She’s pretty much amazing at it, too. Zipping around corners and climbing uphill in a manual transmission whale of a vehicle…no problem for Stef. And all of this doesn’t mention that people here drive on the left side of the road and on the right side of the car (very weird) all while the pedals (clutch, gas, brake) are in the same position as the US. I’m confused even trying to write it.

If you were wondering, I had my chance to take the job. Unfortunately, I met a curb a little too intimately and ended up buying the church a new back-left tire. Not really the most glorious moment of my life. So, you know. Now let us never speak of this again.

By the way, it has been in the 40s and 50s and raining pretty consistently over the last few days. Borderline misery for the impoverished people of the country...the wind and the rain hurts and the temperatures mean that 1.5 million residents of Johannesburg (ya, 1.5 million live in squatter camps) are having a rough couple of days. We're just regretting the fact that we gave away all but one of our blankets. Alas, with proper perspective, we're in really good shape.

Soccer has something to teach American sports, particularly basketball. You know how the basketball season seems so long? And, as a Spurs fan, you basically just wait for the playoffs? Well, soccer has “Cups” sprinkled in throughout the regular season. For instance, right now the “Telkom Knockout” is going on. It is a single-elimination tournament that takes place over a few weekends in October. What is fun about it is that is offers a chance for teams that may not have the chance to win the league title a chance to bring home other hardware. And the fans of AmaZulu (basically the Milwaukee Bucks of the PSL) are excited by their team’s surprising performance and the chance to win something. 1 – Keeps fans interested during the dog days of the regular season. 2 – Keeps general interest in the league high during long season.

Google the "UEFA Champions League" or the "Telkom Knockout" and see how they pick their teams and what a big deal it is. Possibilities, that’s all I’m saying.

I wrote a new song with Stef. It is called “Home (So Far Away)”. I suppose it’s about some of the feelings of isolation here – but it could definitely be referring to the eternity hidden in our hearts and the longings to know them better than the reality we are currently swimming in. We’ll post it soon.

Had a dream about Paesano’s last night. That’s our favorite restaurant in San Antonio. They had redecorated the whole restaurant in some garish Easter colors. Food was the same though. I woke up from that dream with, errr, my mouth watering heavily. Gross. (Stef says, “Don’t write that!! That’s nasty!!” Too late.)

I’ve been preaching every week. Still strange to type that… I imagine my friends from high school reading this and thinking back to the days when I was running around neighborhoods in the middle of the night doing cannonballs into random swimming pools while possibly being in an impaired state. While quite entertaining, they were not my finest hours and certainly not anything that would foreshadow these moments. Nonetheless…

Preaching strikes me as an art form, although it is a particularly difficult art form to judge success in. If you write a book, you can judge success by copies sold. If you record a record, check the charts. If you cook, you can look around the table see how much of what you cooked was eaten and how much is hiding under someone’s napkin. If you preach, well, everyone sits quietly and stares at you, then gets up when you’re done and leaves. An occasional “amen” is obligatory. An elderly woman telling you how moved she was is also a given. Outside of that, there is no gauge. And it’s OK.

darkness into light…

what's going on (from stef)

Hello friends!! It’s me, Stefani!! I know, it’s a miracle, I’m writing. :)

I hope this finds all of you well. Kyle and I are doing wonderful here! I’m learning so much everyday and doing my best to apply it to my life. I feel very blessed to be called to live this life. God is good!

There are hard days here, but what I get to take from them are priceless. There are also very joyful days here which I don’t take for granted. I’m learning not to take things for granted: food, water, shelter, electricity, (common things), but even a warm room, a smile from across a room, a pillow to lay your head on at night, the shoes I walk in everyday, the warm water to bathe in, the ability to walk down the street on a beautiful day, having a family who loves me unconditionally and for who I am. Everything I’ve mentioned here is something I truly learned to not take for granted because of something I’ve seen here and I can honestly say I never will again. The people who experience life without these blessings have impacted my life too much to ever forget.

I’m reading the book “The Heart of the Artist” by Rory Noland. If you even slightly consider yourself an artist, this is a must read. Rory simply lays out what we as artists should be pursuing and what God expects and wants our hearts to look like. It has really taught me so much! I am teaching a music discipleship class on Wednesday nights and the class is divided between going through this book and music theory. The Africans are loving it!! It has been a lot of fun for me too. The only problem we had was a shortage of books. They are very expensive and especially to get shipped here. So, I decided to shoot Mr. Noland himself an email telling him the situation and see what he had to offer. After a few emails back and forth he was able to get 15 books donated for our class!!! How cool is that? Praise the Lord. I’m very thankful for Rory.


I’m leading worship 3 times a week. Kyle has been leading with me which I’m so thankful for. He literally picked up the guitar right before we came and got serious about learning it so he could help me and he has become quite the guitarist!! We have two Sunday services and a Wednesday evening service. I have really enjoyed working with the worship team and getting to know them. We rehearse on Thursday evenings and are working on learning several new songs…I teach them some and they teach me too!! I’m starting piano lessons on Thursday and Friday mornings and I have been doing voice lessons with my friend Jadie which I’m really enjoying! During the rest of the week I’m playing for funerals, weddings, or just whatever!! I think I’ve played for 10 funerals and 2 weddings since we’ve been here. I haven’t attended half as many funerals in my life…thank goodness.

This is just a little bit of what is going on here. God is just really stretching me in every direction and molding me into who He wants me to be. I have a long way to go in the process, but I’m thankful to be in it!